Google+ swCj71E42RfqfgWx3JOogUovB8w Dumbass News: A Day Late: Happy May Day! I'd Like to Kick Your Ass! Twice. : o77OwPu8GHYudT_bxY1ohX-tzdw

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

A Day Late: Happy May Day! I'd Like to Kick Your Ass! Twice.

I owe some members of the Dumbass Horde an apology. This specific "wing" of the Horde are the Dumbasses who come to this two time award-winning blog (as proof I'll add the award logo to the sidebar soon) to bitch, moan,complain and scream raaaaacism, amongst other lies brought on by a major lack of reading comprehension, about what I write. Products of public schools no doubt. Or products of Liberal Pussy parents. But I repeat myself.

My apology, sincere and heartfelt, is due to the fact that I forgot to wish those Dumbasses a Happy May Day. May Day is a big deal in the Commie World that these pencil neck weenies occupy (Wall Street). I made a Commie Funny, huh, Comrades? Now before you Marxist asswipes start crying about what a mean and misinformed Neanderthal I am, let me point you to the official Commie perspective of May Day. I'll write very slowly so you can understand what it is that you are protesting/making a damn fool of yourself/looking like a brain dead moonbat for. Click. This. Link. To. Learn. Something.

Or get somebody to read it to you, as it has no pretty pictures of unicorns shitting Skittles.

I'll wait for you.

Such Nice Young People

Now that, via the link above, I have handed you your worthless ass on a silver platter by presenting those pesky things called facts, don't come crying to me when one day you grow up and/or get out of rehab and realize that on all those occasions in which you participated in an Occupy (insert latest Commie Buzz Word here) event, you were trashing the country and the founding documents that allowed you to make a total boil on the ass of Humanity out of yourself.

You should thank a Conservative for helping to stave off your "leaders'" efforts to destroy what True Americans hold dear - the God-given Right to Be a Dumbass. Or worse.

Better yet, thank a cop or a current or past member of the Armed Forces of the United States for fighting, and in millions of instances giving up their LIFE, so you can breathe the air of those you are "protesting". By "protesting" I of course mean harassing, intimidating and otherwise disrespecting. But what's a little taking a shit on a police car or a few rapes in your tent cities between friends?

You guys kill me. In a metaphorical sense of the word, of course.

Free Advice from a Redneck 

OK, Occupy Pus Pockets, because I believe and have hope in even the worst of the worst of you, I feel compelled to pass along some things you might want to learn and commit to memory. Best of all, I'll do it for free! You used tampons like free stuff don't you? Then you'll absolutely love what I am about to edify you with, again, at no cost to you. Yet.

Free Things for Smelly Commie Pussies to Keep in Mind

  • Hope and pray that the next cop car you take a dump on is being driven by a police officer who is in a real good mood. Otherwise, he/she just might take exception with your actions and relocate you to a nice cozy jail cell in Harlem, occupied (<---another Commie funny; I kill me) by a former enforcer for the Black Panthers named "Foot Long" who hasn't had butt sex for an extended period of time. "Foot Long" will show your anal cavity some real occupation.
  • It would behoove you to keep abreast of which of the people you are irritating the hell out of have 6th Degree Black Belts in some form of Asian self defense that I can't even pronounce, much less spell. As a Public Service to you, I present the tale of a dearly departed Chinese guy who was the recipient of a form of this discipline called Gazebo Fu. 
  • While I do not condone violence unless it is necessary to the plot, I, and many folks just like me, are prepared to a) kick your stinking unAmerican ass if provoked to that point or b) if within the parameters of the Law, blow you and your crotch critters to Kingdom Come. An example of this type of retribution would be if you harmed, or attempted to harm, our women or children or threatened the sanctity of our property, thus creating a sense of fear for the safety of our families. That's just common sense. Deal. With. It.
  •  Here's a very valuable, yet free, reminder about the mindset of some of the people you are fucking with. The only reason they carry (with proper certification, licensing, etc.) a .45 is that Smith & Wesson doesn't make a .46. I'm just sayin'
  • You are breathing their air.
Still With Me?

That's about all I have for now, Comrade. I hope you find the information in this post useful, because it is certainly pertinent to the situation in which you have put yourselves. Re-read it (or have it re-read to you) and be uplifted.

I hope and pray that you Green Turds in the Punch Bowl can maintain a modicum of civility towards those with whom you so vehemently disagree and consider yourselves fortunate that they have acted towards you with little more than looks of disgust, which you so richly deserve and feelings of pity, which you don't.

And take a bath. The lice in your dog shit-lookin' hair do haven't had a drop of water in weeks.

Idiots. And...



  1. I used to think an occupation was a job. Now i know it is a movement, a bowel movement on a cop car.

    And now a word from our sponsors: I don't often drink Kool-Aid, but when I do I drink DNC XS. Stay thirsty my fools.

    1. I think it would be fitting if the cops played the Night Stick Rhapsody on the idiots' skulls.


Humor Blogs - Blog Rankings Google

Follow Us