Google+ swCj71E42RfqfgWx3JOogUovB8w Dumbass News: Lady Needs I D to Order Beer; Presents Stolen I D; To Waitress She Stole It From! : o77OwPu8GHYudT_bxY1ohX-tzdw

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Lady Needs I D to Order Beer; Presents Stolen I D; To Waitress She Stole It From!

Best of Dumbass News

Our story today involves I D theft.

This is a first for Dumbass News.

In the past I have written about this stoopid bitch that was cashing Social Security checks - that were written to her DEAD boyfriend! There was also the time that we discovered that credit card theft is a gateway to becoming a smoker.

While cashing gubmint checks made out to your dead boyfriend and credit card theft are fine felonies indeed, they don't compare to the Dumbassery we will learn about today.

May I See Your ID, Please?

Brianna Priddy is a waitress at the Applebee's in the Denver suburb of Lakewood, Colorado. A couple of weeks ago, Brianna's wallet was stolen from her. In the meantime, somebody was going around the Greater Denver area cashing hundreds of dollars of bad checks using Brianna's stolen ID. This is important to remember.

One day Brianna was at work serving some delicious Applebee's menu fare to the upstanding citizens of the Metro Denver area when a young lady came into the restaurant and was seated in Brianna's section. The young lady, whom we'll call Clarice, then ordered an adult libation. Brianna wasn't sure that Clarice was of legal drinking age, so like the Law and Applebee's company policy dictate, Brianna asked Clarice for some form of identification to verify that Clarice was indeed of the age of majority. Clarice happily complied and presented a drivers license to the waitress.

The ID that Clarice showed the server was Brianna's stolen drivers license! This is what is commonly referred to as "Karma" or as I like to call it, "a swift kick in the nuts".

Do Not Pass "Go"

One can only imagine what Brianna was thinking. But, she kept her cool and calmly took Clarice's drink order then proceeded to call the local constabulary post haste.

Clarice was taken into police custody and charged with a bunch of shit that will keep her behind bars for a few years, where her I D will consist of a string of numbers on a striped jumpsuit.



  1. So, dumbass "Clarice" didn't even bother to LQQK at the picture on the ID she stole, then handed to the victim?

    That's some superconcentrated dumbass, is what that is!

  2. At least when "Clarice" gets out of jail, she should be old enough that no one will ever ask to see her ID.

    1. You got that right!

      On top of that, she'll have her very own State-issued I D while she's in the slammer.

  3. That is some super duper dumbassery!

    1. All that Dumbassery and NO BEER!



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