Google+ swCj71E42RfqfgWx3JOogUovB8w Dumbass News: Dumbass Threatens to Eat Divorce Judge's Kids! : o77OwPu8GHYudT_bxY1ohX-tzdw

Friday, December 20, 2013

Dumbass Threatens to Eat Divorce Judge's Kids!

Divorce.

One of the ugliest words in the English language. Unless of course you are married to a real motherfucker. If you find/have found yourself in the position of being hitched to a steaming pile of yak shit of a spouse, then the word "divorce" rings in your ears like the Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing the Hallelujah Chorus.

Still, it is always in your best interest, especially if kids are involved, to conduct yourself civilly during divorce proceedings.

James Satterfield of Cobb County, Georgia probably wishes he had done so.

But, as the old Carole King song goes, "it's too late, baby now, it's too late".

She Got the Gold Mine, I Got the Shaft

You see, James Satterfield went through a divorce in which he felt he was unfairly treated. There are ways to remedy court rulings in which one feels he or she has been given the short end of the stick. These remedies involve lawyers, judges and all kinds of other fun-filled legal system avenues. James, being all pissed off at the judge in his divorce case, forewent these processes. Instead, good ol' Jimmy wrote a letter to the presiding judge in the matter of the dissolution of his marriage.

What could possibly go wrong?
Loves Children...Especially With Salt & Mustard

I guess that nothing would go wrong unless in the letter to Hizzoner you threaten to murder his children and "cook them first to make them more palatable".

Any father would immediately take great offense at such a threat.

But not just any father can throw your lousy ass in jail and toss away the key.

A father who is a County Superior Court Judge can.

In addition to threatening to make the judge's kids his supper, the warrant for James' arrest also stated that he had written a check to his soon-to-be ex-wife for $72,000, moved out of his apartment and told his family to give away his belongings.

Oh, yeah, one more thing.

James had a gun in his truck.

With this evidence in hand, Authorities determined that James was about to carry out (carry out! kids for lunch! hahahaha!) his nefarious plot.

This is why Jim Bob is in the County Lock Up being held without bail.

To be accurate, it wasn't the judge in James' divorce case that threw him in the slammer, it was another judge altogether.

James was also ordered to undergo a psychiatric evaluation.

Ya think?

Dumbass.

2 comments:

  1. I heard they are pretty good eating with some BBQ sauce!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Next to brisket, kids are the Number 1 choice for BBQ in Texas.

      Delete

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