Google+ swCj71E42RfqfgWx3JOogUovB8w Dumbass News: Winter Olympics Suck & Dumbass Sports Headlines! : o77OwPu8GHYudT_bxY1ohX-tzdw

Saturday, February 8, 2014

Winter Olympics Suck & Dumbass Sports Headlines!

Evidently the Winter Olympics are going on over in Russia.

I don't give a shit.

Except for maybe hockey and curling.

And everybody knows that only Canada-ites and people from Minny-soda excel at hockey and curling.

I think that it has something to do with beer and weed - two things I know a little bit about. OK, a lot about. In a former life, of course.

I'd rather tune in to the Redneck Channel and watch horse shoe pitchin', especially while the horses are still wearing them.

Even the Scandi Gefilte Network broadcasts better sporting events than the Winter Olympics. For example the North American Wife-Carrying Championships.

Fugitabout the Winter Olympics.

And fuck Communist Russia.

"USA! USA! USA! We suck at hockey and curling! Unless We Are from Minny-soda! USA!"

Best of Dumbass News

Welcome, Ladies and Gentlemen, to the Worldwide Leader in Dumbass Sports! 

We did not become the Number 1 Dumbass Sports Site in the Known Universe by accident.

No!

We became the Number 1 Dumbass Sports Site in the Known Universe by default!

Honestly, do you really think that there is another Dumbass out there who actually gives a shit about Dumbass Sports such as The North American Wife Carrying Championships

Or The Event Formerly Known as the Redneck Olympic Games?

Hell. No!

We're Number 1 (by default)! We're Number 1 (by default)!

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Dumbasses.
                                                                             

10 comments:

  1. Curling = another excuse to drink beer.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's why in the Old Days, I liked to watch it. BEER!

      I haven't had a Beer Commercial in four years.

      Now I hate curling.

      Delete
    2. They take curling pretty seriously around these parts. I live about 6 miles from an Olympic trials site.

      LOL . . . I remember those beer commercials!

      Delete
    3. I checked the curling club's website. They have a bonspiel coming up this month. Team entry fee is $200 plus two cases of beer.

      LMAO . . . that's no joke!

      Delete
  2. I'm also not into the Olympics. Dumbass Russia can suck a big one.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't give a shit about 'em either.

      Fuck Russia.

      Delete
  3. My God, I love the media sometimes...

    ReplyDelete

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