Google+ swCj71E42RfqfgWx3JOogUovB8w Dumbass News: DIY Bee Extermination = $50,000 House Fire! : o77OwPu8GHYudT_bxY1ohX-tzdw

Thursday, June 19, 2014

DIY Bee Extermination = $50,000 House Fire!

I am not one would call a Handy Man.

Sure, I can do simple things around the Dumbass Dome. like stompin' theeverlovin' life out of an invading spider. Or clean up where ever Lou Lou the Official Cat of Dumbass News hocks up a slimy ass cat loogie.

I mean I can operate a screwdriver or a hammer with the bet of them, other than that sort of thing though, I am about as useful as tits on a boar hog when it comes to any type pf handiwork to be done around the Dumbass Dome.

I am not alone.

Take this Dumbass in Lake Worth, Florida, for example.

His name is Mario. Our man Mario had a bee problem at his home in Lake Worth. Mario, being the Dumbass and cheap bastard that he is, just knew he could rid his home of these pesky bees instead of calling The Orkin Guy.

Instead, Mario rid the pesky bees of his house! Who'd a thunk that?

Mario had this bee infestation at his house and instead of calling in a Professional Bee Guy to take care of the situation, Mario decided only a Dumbass could not get the problem solved. So, Mario creates his own Dumbass Version of a Bee Guy's smoke thingy and goes after the bees which were in a supporting column on a second story balcony.

Things were going swimmingly.

Then the fire started.

And it kept burning.

And burning.

And burning, until there was over 50 thousand dollars worth of damage to his home!

But because Mario is a Dumbass, the Fickle Finger of Fate (thanks, Laugh In) pointed squarely at him. Not only did Mario El Dumbass-o do 50G's worth of damage to his house, the ensuing fire did not rid the house of the bees!

I don't care who you are, except for Mario and perhaps Mrs. Mario, that right there is too damn funny.

I just hope that Mario had his Stoopid Fucker Insurance paid up.

Dumbass.

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