Google+ swCj71E42RfqfgWx3JOogUovB8w Dumbass News: New at Dunkin Donuts: The Donut Ho! : o77OwPu8GHYudT_bxY1ohX-tzdw

Sunday, September 21, 2014

New at Dunkin Donuts: The Donut Ho!

Best of Dumbass News

There's a Dunkin Donuts on Route 46 in Parsippany, New Jersey that has added an item to their menu. Dunkin calls the new item is called "The Extra Sugar". Local cops call it prostitution. I would have called it the "donut hole", but I am a sick, twisted freak. 

Let me splain.
America Humps on Dunkin

Melissa Redmond works the overnight shift at one of the local Dunkin Donuts in Parsippany and it seems that she was serving more than donuts and coffee to some of her customers.

After receiving a tip from an informant, cops set up surveillance and observed Melissa leaving her post in the store to go to the cars of select customers, stay for 10 or 15 minutes and then return to work. It didn't take long for the cops to catch on so Melissa the Donut Ho was arrested for selling "Extra Sugar".

One of the first things that popped into my mind when I read this story was why in the name of all that is Holy would someone some sell their "coolatta" from a donut shop? Think about it. Donuts. Cops. Those two go together like Justin Bieber music and syrup of ipecac. But, I digress.

The moral to the story is twofold.

First, being a hooker is bad.

Second, being a hooker where a cops shows up every five minutes is just plain stoopid. If a woman wants to sell her "creme filled" pastry, sell it where the cops DO NOT show up!

Like at a Likker Store. :)

Dumbass.

2 comments:

  1. I hope she at least washed her hand(s) before returning to work

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Food safety *is* very important.

      Maybe she hanged a little "Employees Must Wash Hands Before Returning to Work" sign on her customers' weenies as a reminder.

      Delete

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